Help for Parents of Children Diagnosed with ADHD

Hello to all parents w/children of ADHD. I am a parent who for 12 yrs of schooling went thru a nightmare with my son who is now 23. I say to you all that you must study all about this when your child is in school and get them all the help that you can. Know what your talking about when it comes to all meetings and programs for your child.know that a reular MD is sot to give your child medications unless he/she has been thoughly tested. Research and write down questions and answers before you speak. My son was very servere ADHD and was taught what it was, how it effects him and made him understand what he can do himselve to try and use differnt tasks in life. it helped him after he graduated and went into the work scene. he used all the tools that were taught to him since he was 6yrs old. You DO NOT get rid of ADHD but you put a great handle on it and be aware of your actions. its ALOT of work but it does pay off. If Any PARENTS need guidance or links, i have been a advocated for many years and I would love to help. Email me at mimes55@aol.com

Again, I write to all PARENTS.DO NOT LET THE SCHOOLS LABEL YOUR CHILD.I am writing again because it gets me so mad when i hear that a regular visit to your medical dr. gave a percription for your child without TESTING. there are channels to go thru to determine if your child is ADD/ADHD.It takes 2-3 opinions to come to establish this and much patients. having a ADHD child is a job and must be alert from the morning til night. take notes on behavior,timing on H.W.,How he acts during the day and his/hers strong and weakness. Good Luck

There really is no playbook after an ADHD diagnosis. It falls on the parents to investigate what ADHD was and what treatments are out there. Med. professionals are limited what they can do, thus, why medication is often prescribed. Our advice: seek out other parents dealing with ADHD (support group) through your child’s Dr. or CHADD. Find parents of kids with ADHD at your kid’s school too; see what in-school interventions they’re receiving. Fight for you child to get the same. ADHD cannot be treated only with meds.: school interventions, behavioral therapy, social skills training and parenting changes are all required. It’s a long road. Our son is only 4.5 and he is in the throngs of ADHD. Medication has not been successful for us.

My son was diagnosed with ADHD a couple of years ago after a year of torment in Kindergarten with a teacher who insisted that he was just lazy. He was paddled many times, not for behavior issues, but simply for not doing his work. We all know how great that works on a ADHD child and his/her self esteem. She told me on many occasions that he didn’t have behavior issues, just that he was “lazy” and that she felt that I (his mother) had always done everything for him and that’s why he was the way he was. I kept insisting to her that he was anything but a lazy child and I expressed time after time my concerns that he may have learning problems. Just know that the school systems where I live are not allowed to recommend in any way, shape or fashion that a child should be put on medications nor can they mention they feel the child may be ADHD. So, when you bring up to the school about this concern, you may find yourself talking to a wall. We were fortunate enough to have insurance that would cover having our son tested by our own Psychologist, not the school psychologist who wouldn’t test him until certain criteria were met and then the process takes forever. He was diagnosed as “without a doubt” ADHD combined time. In the meantime, your child falls further and further behind along with any self esteem he/she may have left after being made to feel stupid or bad! This Kindergarten teacher made my son sit in the front of the class with his back facing the class the entire year! When I would go to visit the class, which by the way she strongly discouraged, the other kids would tell me that “John” was in trouble today or “John has been bad today”. The next year was better because he had a teacher who was patient and understanding. As far as his academics go, he does okay in everything except math and there are so many days it seems hopeless. He has other “unspecified” learning problems along with the ADHD, but we have no name to go with them. Too many people, even teachers, don’t take ADHD seriously and feel it is more of an excuse than anything…until of course you don’t give them their meds and they can’t keep the child sitting down or quite. My son cannot possibly learn the same as the other kids in his class, but unfortunately, he is expected to. He will be in third grade this year 08-09, and he must pass the CRCT test to pass 3rd grade. I just don’t think he can do it. Even with meds, he just can’t seem to grasp things. Every night, it may take 2 hours to complete 5 math problems and that’s with crying and begging and all that fun stuff. I so do not look forward to it and I feel so hopeless. Has anyone ever felt this way before??? The school psychologist felt that his borderline intelligence was due primarily to the ADHD…then why is the meds not working!! He sees a psychiatrist every month who I adore. But, her hands are tied because it is all up to the school system. We have all kinds of programs in our school systems to help immigrant students, MR students and especially autisitc children and I think that is wonderful…but ours just seem to get passed by and we continue to hold them back each year and keep expecting them to be able to take a pill and voila…suddenly they can learn just like normal children. My son hates school and that’s not good. HELP!!! And, while I’m on a role….doctors need to stop prescribing children ADHD meds every time a Mom can’t control her child or feels that her child gets on her nerves. This makes it so much worse on those children who DO have ADHD. georgiangela@yahoo.com

I AM A MOTHER OF FOUR CHILDREN BUT, I HAVE ONE THAT HAS BEEN DIAGNOISED W/ADHD WHICH I DO AGREE HE IS BC HE HAS ALL SYMPTOMS TO THIS DISEASE! I HAVE A PROBLEM THOUGH WE HAVE TRIED ALMOST ALL ADHD MEDICATIONS MAKING ME SICK ABOUT THIS BUT, I JUST DONT UNDERSTAND WHAT ELSE TO DO BECAUSE OF HIS GRADES BEING ALL F’S!!! THIS IS THE ONLY REASON I GIVE HIM MEDS ! I REALLY DONT SEE WHY I SHOULD ANYMORE BC NONE HAVE IMPROVED HIS GRADES SO FAR. I WANT TO TRY MAYBE AN HERBAL DRUG SO I WONT FEEL AS IM DRUGGING MY SON. I LOVE TO SEE HIM PLAY W/ HIS SIBLINGS AND HATE THE ZOMBIENESS!!! PLEASE HELP HE NEEDS TO PASS SCHOOL AND P.S. HE HATES SCHOOL BUT LOVES ANY OUTDOOR EVENT! SHANCEEWILTZ@AOL.COM

If you aren’t seeing benefits on the medicine, I can understand your reticence to continue. Talk with your child’s doctor about all your concerns related to the medication. It often takes some trial and error to get the meds adjusted correctly. Make sure that the doctor is experienced in treating ADHD.

You should also talk with your son’s teacher about accommodations in the classroom that would help his learning. Here is an article with simple modifications that can be done in any classroom.
http://add.about.com/od/childrenandteens/a/schoolsuccess.htm

Also, has your child been evaluated for a learning disability? It is possible that the school difficulties are related to a specific learning disability such as a reading, math, auditory processing disorder, etc. Ask the school to provide a comprehensive educational evaluation and assessment.

Does your child have a 504 plan in place? A 504 plan is a legal document that outlines a plan of instructional services for a child. Does he have an IEP or Individualized Educational Plan? Talk with the school about getting services in place that will help your son reach his full academic potential. He will begin to feel more positively about school when adjustments are made to help with learning.