Friendships and ADHD
Friday April 4, 2008
Maintaining friendships can be a struggle for those with ADD/ADHD, but positive relationships are important in our lives. Without them we can feel isolated and alone. With them we feel connected and valued.
ADHD Coach, Cynthia Hammer, MSW, provides some insights. Click on Friendships and ADHD to read more.
How has ADD/ADHD affected your friendships? What strategies have you found most helpful for maintaining positive relationships?
Photo © Microsoft
Prior to being diagnosed with adult ADD, life was defined as a succession of
failed relationships, missed opportunities, extreme mood swings, low self-esteem and generalized apathy.
When my psychiatrist explained how I met all the criteria for this diagnosis, my world opened and suddenly made sense – at least for me. Family and acquaintences were rather ignorant at a time when their support would have been welcomed.
Unprovided with original learning, uninformed in the habits of thinking, and unskilled in the art of composition, I resolved to write a book
about my experience.
I have come to believe we are all born with the capacity to be great. To achieve and succeed in a rapidly changing world, is to be committed to living the examined life oneself – if only we believe in what we can do.
History’s most revolutionary minds, did
not allow a learning disorder, to discourage courage from developing their powers of observation and cultivating an open mind. Einstein and Shakespeare, outstanding leaders and writers, shared a commitment to personal growth and creativity.
We are the brightest of the bright. Sadly, we ended up in schools where the majority of teachers assumed the same curriculum could be applicable to students with individual needs. Perhaps in a stimulating environment
fostering creativity instead of raw bland facts, we wouldn’t be besieged with the problems we battle daily. We could have thrived. Instead we were subject to labeling and considered underachievers.
We need to understand and embrace our diagnosis, discover what we love and have a passion for and offer it to others in the form of service.
What a wonderful feeling to have a purpose, to recognize self-authenticity, and be surrounded by close relationships. Nothing could be more gratifying than to prove that with encouragement, support and sheer determination, there is nothing to stand between us and attaining life long goals.
Well said Laurie.
Thank you for sharing. Best of luck with your book, as well. Is it in progress or have you completed it?
Yes,Yes,and Yes!Since I was a child I have always had difficulty with holding onto alot of friends,but the people that did stick around have a positive influence on me. I was not diagnosed with ADHD until I was in my 3rd year of college, and it opened my eyes up to an entire new look at the world. I percieve everything different including friendship.With ADHD, you don’t percieve anything the same way as a person withough ADD/ADHD, and it is hard to feel connected with other people who can’t walk in your shoes each day with my ADHD.